So, I don't know about you, but I've been hanging on by threads lately...
The corporate fascist bullshit in Wisconsin, Michigan and Ohio have me furious. (If you hadn't guessed.)
And this past weekend, I learned of an old childhood friend's death. He was 47. He died of diabetes and complications with his pancreas. He was a truly, truly kind person... When he asked how you were, he waited for the reply. And in place of flowers, he requested that all donations go to a local animal shelter... He was crazy about life and died way too young...
This combined with the tsunami and its horrible aftermath, and subsequent disaster of the nuclear power plants is enough to crumple me. Humanity is ROYALLY fucking up. And for what? Energy. As though that makes us happier. People move a hell of a lot faster these days and we still have NO IDEA where we're going in such a hurry...
I could just curl up in a ball and go back to bed for the next ten years.
But, of course, that wouldn't do any good...
Can you imagine the bed-head and my BREATH???
That shit would be stank, gurl...
Life is messy. Extremely so. It's death. And it's birth. And it's suffering. And laughter and tears and greed and delusion and joy and kindness and strength and it's AALLLL kinds of crazy shizzle wrapped into one big fucking muy caliente burrito.
Change.
It's the only thing that remains the same... The only constant.
I try to remind myself in times like these of the immense metamorphosis of life and existence. I try to remind myself how very fortunate I am RIGHT NOW for this very moment. Because it's the only thing that's real...
And in light of how temporary it all is, we should live, exactly how we wish to...
It's an open road, bishes...
"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."
~ Steve Jobs
Live like you mean it.
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(source of photos)
(And thank you for the Steve Jobs quote, Deb!)
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Humility does not mean believing oneself to be inferior, but to be freed from self-importance. It is a state of natural simplicity which is in harmony with our true nature and allows us to taste the freshness of the present moment.
A friend of mine sent the following to me the other day. The author is a friend of hers and she wanted to pass his message along.
"Like most of you Linda and I live on a nice middle class street with nice middle class people. Our neighbors are nice and try to keep their homes and property in good shape. There is and has always been one main offender. The culprit lives two houses away from us. She’s an ageless kind of woman, and has been the object of scorn and ridicule on our street. She’s large and unkempt in her appearance. Her house is an eyesore. There’s wild growth all around, and she does little to keep it up. She’s prone to angry outbursts with little provocation. Kids in the neighborhood are terrified of her. My daughters grew up intimidated by her. Her wrath is easily unleashed if she feels threatened in any way. We all know to keep our cars away from her driveway, or park anywhere near her personal space. On July fourth she displays her own explosions if any fireworks come near her home. The older kids taunt her, and have been known to vandalize her property. They seem to enjoy the predictable show. Oh, by the way, her name is Diane.
"One of the interesting things about Diane is that she always apologizes after her outbursts. Over the years we’ve just learned to live with our crazy lady neighbor. Diane does often wander over to spark friendly conversation with me. I try to be polite, but I really just want her to go away. It’s not my fault she’s large and sloppy looking. Why should I put effort into someone like that? She doesn’t even rake her leaves. We’ve known for over twenty years that she doesn’t live alone in that house. Her mother lives with her. What’s interesting is that no one has ever seen her mother. An ambulance comes by sporadically, but always leaves after a while.
"Several weeks ago Diane rang our door bell. It was Linda’s turn to answer, and my turn to hide behind the door. Linda asked her what she wanted. She came over to tell us her mother died that morning. Linda and I were both frozen. When our mother’s died we never gave a thought to Diane. She was far from our radar. She needed what anyone would need at a time like that, but she came to our house. We hugged her and asked her in. I learned more about Diane that night then I had in the twenty plus years she’d been our neighbor.
"Diane was adopted as an infant, but when her parents realized she was impaired they shunned her. She learned early in life that there was no one she could count on but herself. She’s never felt cared for or loved by anyone. When her mother got ill Diane was the only one to take care of her. The other siblings simply didn’t have time. What I then learned astounded me. Diane had little education, but had worked three low paying jobs to pay off the mortgage on the house. She still managed to take her bed ridden mother for dialysis treatments. Hours before she died her mother told Diane she loved her. That’s the only time she heard those words from her mother. Her eyes lit up when she proudly told us she felt pretty accomplished for a person with a learning disability and brain damage. The light went off in my head. She was brain damaged; the outbursts now made sense. It was the first time I saw animation in her eyes. They were also blue and pretty. Days later she brought me the eulogy she spent hours working on.
"Diane challenged my perception of myself as a person committed to acts of kindness. Maybe that’s because it’s easy to hold the door open for someone, or help someone who falls in front of you. The real acts require a sacrifice. I might have to stop what I’m doing and really pay attention. I might have to let go of my mood and think of someone else. I might also have to open my eyes. Diane has touched me, and I’m grateful to her. She brought home my obligation as a real human being."
His story certainly struck a cord in me and is a great reminder that unless we take the time to find out, we have NO IDEA what someone has gone through, or what they're going through... And even then, we'll only have a clue.
So, I guess what I'm thinking this morning for a little "Sunday Worship" is to honor ourselves and each other.
To reach...
for the stars in compassion and empathy. Not because we "should", but because we can. And when I say "stars", I'm referring to one another... We're the ones making up the constellations in the sky I'm thinking of...
We're capable of great things, you and I and us. Of great love... And we don't even have to speak in order to convey that... Actually, it's probably better we keep our voice to a minimum and listen tenfold.
And I happen to think that's worth a little bit of "worship", a little bit of reverence, a little bit of reflection.
I know I'm not perfect. And I know that I'll stumble. But for right now, I'm going to try.
So, during the past few months, there have been some scares in my family. My Sister had been having some symptoms that were mimicking multiple sclerosis and had a doctor that was mimicking a fucking asshole. And my Mother was diagnosed with melanoma on her arm.
We were very, very fortunate in both outcomes and the man in me was "certain" we would be. While the little boy in me wasn't so sure, but shivered quietly and sent desperate prayers out in the air.
If we're "lucky" indeed... And chances are, if you're reading this, you're better off than most people on the planet. So, there is much to be grateful for...
And I try to remind myself of that as often as I can. I don't always succeed in it, but it's well worth trying. And if I don't, life will have a way of reminding me whether I like it or not. So for now, for this very beautiful moment, I'll try to beat life to the punch and remind myself how very lucky I am.
Happy New Year, bishes! I truly hope it's your best one yet.
Be Kind. Not because you might be rewarded for it later. But, because you're rewarded for it NOW. It's just good to be good. Trust me. Your heart likes it that way. And the World needs it that way.
Life is still beautiful... And that wonderful man and adorable, enormous baby hummingbird helped remind me of that. So, thank you, Sir... I needed that.
(And thank you, Elisa! For this fantastic contribution.)
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Act Compassionately When You Can"I have a friend who is plagued by panhandlers when he walks to work. For a while he ignored them, but it was impossible. After wrestling with his anger and guilt – for he did want to do the right thing – he collected change in his pockets, and no matter who asked him, he gave something. Immediately his anger vanished. And then his eyes opened, he saw that these people really are lost and alone, and it is an act of cruelty for him to withhold the meager amount they want.
"It feels remarkable when petty anger can be transformed to so noble a feeling as compassion. Yet in this case it happened in a moment, thanks to a simple shift in perception. The true self doesn’t goad us into being good. It takes our existing impulses and views them in a new light. Insight opens the gates of the heart.
"Many times a day each of us feels the impulse, however, faint, of saintliness. Walk down a city street for ten minutes and you see all around you reasons to give, to help, to offer charity and compassion, to forgive, and perhaps even to love.
"In each situation, the need to cut oneself off is present, because that has been a long habit, but a fresher impulse also arises. The true self is sending these new signals.
"Notice and feel them. Dwell on them instead of pushing them down. Avoid your habit of turning away or being too afraid to act. Act when you can. Appreciate your own goodness and congratulate yourself whenever you move closer, if by an inch, to your true self. That’s the program, and it is a simple one.
"The credo of the true self is joy with detachment. The joy comes from no longer having to cling to a small, defended territory. The detachment comes from having such wide awareness that everything is at once yours and not yours."
Adapted from The Deeper Wound: Recovering the Soul from Fear and Suffering, by Deepak Chopra (Harmony Books, 2001). (source)
I just about went through the roof when I read that...
MORE THAN ENOUGH "forgiveness" has been given to this sick fuck.
And as far as I'm concerned, this,
is what should be on the field with him. But then, like any instant interpretation when one doesn't know the history, it makes the dog look like the vicious one.
So, as usual, comments on the article steal the show.
"Endrun" wrote, "Funniest thing I've heard in a while...To all you Vick supporters, don't forget that Vick not only fought dogs, he killed them with his own hands by hanging, drowning, and bludgeoning them to death if they didn't perform up to his standards. Innocent animals were used as bait to train the fighting dogs. It is well documented in the book "The Lost Dogs" if you care to educated yourself. Yes, he did some prison time, but that doesn't change the fact that he is a depraved person with no empathy. He fits in well in the NFL with the other felons and thugs, and gives me one more reason to hate the Eagles."
And "Lester" said, "This Just In: In a sharing of the love, a spokesman for the dog lobby said that most dogs would love to have Vick as a pet one day as well."
"Busters" wrote, "This jerk should still be in prison,not running around making millions and running his mouth. I agree with with Jane Dollinger, Vick should never be able to get within 50 feet of a Dog unless its a pack of wolves,getting back for their close kin."
And "Kathy" said, "Just a ploy to try to get back his million dollar pay. Just look at the statements. Big dog so he can show how much he cares. Not any dog, a big dog. More than likely a pit bull so he can make up for his inadequate manhood.
"Professional Sports depend on stupid people putting the players on a pedestal so they will pay rediculus prices to go watch thier hero. This man is just trying to get back on his pedestal.
Just another scam."
"Kimmer" got right to the point and said, "You're kidding, right?"
"Charlie Chan" (who I hope isn't putting cats in the Chicken Chow Mein) wrote, "May this man never be able to own a dog. He watched them fight for enjoyment, and killed some of them with his bare hands. Of the 51 dogs rescued from his compound, 47 of them were rehabilitated and found loving homes. Several of them are working therapy dogs. Vick was ordered to pay nearly a million dollars for their lifetime care and rehab. He had to be MADE to do it. His crime wasn't just about breaking the law, it was about horrible cruelty to a living thing. That is an uncorrectable character flaw. No, this man should never own a pet of any kind. Ever."
Now "Me" wrote (and no, it's not me. I mean it IS "Me", but not me-me.) "This monster killed dogs with his bare hands and even said he never would have stopped if he hadn't been arrested. He should still be in prison."
"Ckc" suggested, "Maybe an ant farm but nothing more."
Poor ants... How 'bout we just let him have some gravel?
And "PT" wrote, "I'd like to have Michael Vick as a pet someday...but thanks to Abraham Lincoln I can't."
"Sudden Impac" said, "Vick will say anything that he thinks we want to hear, & act like he has remorse. Who wouldn't to salvage a multi-million dollar career. I don't mean to be judgmental, but I'm not convinced he is sorry for his evil actions against innocent animals. I have friends that have pit-bulls as the family dog & they make great pets."
They do indeed, Mr. Impac.
"Travis" wrote, "That dirty scumbag shouldn't even be allowed to have a ChiaPet....He is a perfect example of why we should bring back hanging, drawing and quartering!!!!"
Okay, now even though we're talking about "vick", Travis had me right up to "Chia Pet". And then, it just kinda went downhill from there...
Now, "Owen" is kinder than most people, "I am totally against what he did. I also believe that our justice system is set up to try to punish criminals and rehabilitate them. The man has done his time in prison. Let him do some time with therapy dogs. They go to old folks homes, hospitals, and things like that. It is a great program and if he is with the same group of dogs again and again he might learn to love them. He should never be allowed to have a "fighting" dog again but there are many breeds and one day in the future he might earn the right to have one in his house. I would have a person go by unannounced once in a while to make sure the dog is in good health and being treated well."
Owen, just for the record, I believe it's not a "right" to have a dog as a companion, it's a privilege. But, I truly respect your compassion and forgiveness... I don't fully agree, but that's my short-coming, not yours.
"Trimmer" wrote, "Vick should be euthanized!"
And "C" wrote, "A stuff toy dog is all he'll ever get."
And "Kix" wrote, "Giving Vick a dog is like giving a molester a child."
And "SpiceGirl" reminded me of "Owen" and was quite kind as well, "You know, l deplore what he did, completely and totally. But this has cost him more than many murderers. It cost him more money than I'll ever see in my life, his reputation, almost his career, and 2 years of his life. Even now, despite the contract he has with the Eagles, he's living on a stipend that isn't much more than what most of us live on in order to fulfill his bankruptcy obligations and costs ($4200 per month per an article I read last week).
"He has gone over and above what anyone has asked in order to do his pennance and move forward, and now is doing the right thing. He deserves the second chance we all get when we screw up.
"I'm not saying we should just forget, but dang. We don't treat murderers this bad and never give them a shot at redemption. Let the thumbs down begin.... cuz I know they're coming from this hateful, unforgiving crowd."
I couldn't help myself, I gave her a "thumbs-down". (Which in Roman times would've gotten her killed. So, at least in our society, it's evolved into just a gesture, rather than a suggestion.) And on a really, really forgiving level, which when it comes to animals and children, I stumble with, she's right. Beyond my current capacity for compassion, but she's right. But, I still gave that bish a "thumbs-down".
"Md" wrote, "This loser should be killed.
"Please die."
And then, "Md" wrote, "This loser should be killed.
"Please die."
"Md"? We heard you the first time.
And then "Alea" wrote, "I hope he does get a dog and that dog turns on him and rips his weener off in shreads!"
She received 14 "thumbs-up" on that one.
But then, "Trimmer" replied, "What weener?"
You guys... It's "wiener". With an "i".
"Tree" wrote, "To the Australian Outback with him! The Dingos ought to know how to handle him..."
"NavyVet" said, "It would be more appropriate for a dog to own him."
Ahhh... Mr. NavyVet, when you truly love something or someone, it usually does.
Well, whatever your opinion is, here at Herculaneum, or kevincharnas.com, this place in which we're residing for the moment, I always hate to leave us feeling... yucky. SO, compliments of "Yanni", we have the below video contribution of a gentleman true to his convictions, Mr. Lance Briggs.
Thank you for this contribution, Yanni! Lance is hot.
And vick is not.
*** If you're looking for an animal companion, please consider adopting and rescuing. There's rescue groups for every breed. And you'll probably find that they rescued you, just as much as you rescued them.
Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love, for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.
Take kindly to the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with god (universe, everything, nothing), whatever you conceive him (her, it) to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.
Don't forget what's within you.
Do what you need to do in order to collect yourself,
To gather your strength,
To stoke the fierce fires in your depths.
And once you've remembered it,
Embrace it
And consume it
And let yourself be consumed by it.
Then, don't you dare surrender it
To the mindless
To the selfish
To the stone-hearted, ugly fools
Who think that strength
Resides in brute force,
Who think that ferocious intolerance
And an aggressive character
Constructs a backbone
Worth standing upright for...
They mistake kindness for weakness.
So, don't you dare
Give way to these sleeping barbarians.
Do not misplace
Your best
Your understanding
Your wisdom,
Your LOVE,
To the vagrants of greed
To the keepers of ignorance
To the nomadic devolved
Stumbling blind in their parched desert.
Keep your bright eyes from your noble boat
Piercing that darkness
Knowing that while your vessel may not
Reach the shore
While you're at the helm,
It will
Eventually make landfall
As you keep your bearing.
And the rest of the crew will step foot
On the good earth
And be home...
"One day when I was in the ninth grade I was cornered by some older kids who roughed me up. They said that I was a faggot, and that I should die and go to hell where I belonged. That erupted the fear that I had kept pushed down, that what I was beginning to feel on the inside must somehow be showing on the outside. ... There must be something very wrong with me, I thought. Something I could never let my family or anyone else know."
- Joel Burns, a city councilman in Fort Worth, Texas (source)
Bravo, Mr. Burns. BRAVO.
If people had ANY inkling of the amount and depth of the isolation, despair and self-loathing that comes with society's intolerant views of homosexuality and being different, it would be crystal clear that it's not a choice.
What IS a choice is living with dignity and grace and love. And that's the sweetest revenge.
The following story comes from "Dawn" - and I dunno where girlfriend heard it from, but it comes to us by way of her. Thank you, Dawn! It couldn't be truer.
Ever hear the story of the person looking for a place to live who stops at a gas station with two older gentleman sitting outside? The man asks the two older gentleman if the town up ahead is a good place to live. The one gentleman answers with a question, "Well, I'll tell you, but first tell me about the place you're coming from."
The man says, "Well, it was pretty awful, people weren't friendly, there aren't any jobs and the town just looks awful."
The gentleman then says, "Well, the town ahead is pretty much the same, you may want to look somewhere else for a place to live."
The man thanks him and leaves.
About an hour later another man pulls up and asks the same question in which the older gentleman answers with the same question. The man replies and says that he's "really sad to leave his old town. That the people were so kind and that the town was such a lovely place to raise a family but that his job closed its doors and he had to leave."
The older gentleman responded with, "Then you will love the town up ahead, it's just like your old town". The man thanked him and was on his way.
The second gentleman looked at the older gentleman and said, "Why did you tell the first man that it was a bad town, but the second one that it was a good town?"
The older, wiser gentleman said, "It's not where you live but your attitude about where you live. If you always see the negative then everything in your life will reflect that and nothing will ever be enough. But, if you always look for the good, then you will bring that joy and love of life with you and you will always find a home filled with peace and love."
I hope you find happiness where you are. Dont forget to look for the silver lining or your life will always be dull :)
Okay... So, I've got to be honest. I've been suffering some depression this Summer. I'm overwhelmed with grim news of the decaying environment - the giant fucking oil disaster in the Gulf was a real kick in my balls - and our ridiculous congress
dropping the ball (not surprisingly) on real legislation for protecting our environment, our world, literally our home - that might as well have been another kick in my poonany.
I receive so many damn emails daily of atrocities towards animals and humanity, I usually just want to crawl back into bed. Or pour whiskey into my coffee. Or just pour whiskey into my whiskey.
And much of the time, I feel like this,
like I'm holding back a giant asshole in a diaper.
Well, the other day, Will and I went to see the film, Coco Chanel and Igor Stravinsky. It was alright... I really wouldn't recommend seeing it. The story line was kind of weak. And I've never been a big fan of Stravinsky's work, so the music alone made me want to pull my teeth out. Or better yet, pull someone else's teeth out. However, the music combined with the ballet was certainly easier to take and made more sense. And once I was educated on just exactly what was going on, it was actually inspiring and invigorating. So, I suppose my previous dislike of it and judgment of something that I really knew nothing about said more about me than his work.
Well, besides all of that, there was a quote in the film that got me.
In May 1913, when Stravinsky debuted his ballet "The Rite of Spring" in Paris, the crowd literally freaked out. They were jeering and booing and walking out - just in the first few minutes. It was quite a painful scene - a riot, in fact. I watched the scene in the film uncomfortably as a performer and an artist and thought what guts people have to keep going when they're being ridiculed with such hostility. I would like to think that I would go on with my performance... But knowing myself a little too well, I think I would've probably bent over and showed all those fuckers my hole.
Here's a recreation of the exact choreography that debuted in The Rite of Spring, if you're so inclined:
The French audience was used to more conventional ballets - something more refined and traditional, like Tchaikovsky's Swan Lake. And during this debut, they were literally punching one another before intermission and the fuzz had to show up. But, even as the second act resumed, so did the punching. They were out-of-control. It was out of their comfort zone. (I would pay money to have witnessed that...)
Stravinsky was mortified. Understandably. But, one of his homeboys said to him, "Igor, my big, strapping, Russian-vho-keeps-me-varm-in-cold-Rusky-Vinters, homosexual, lover-vith-vodka-on-top, Igor, (or something like that), Vhat do you do vhen convronted by a monster?"
And Igor said, "I put that bad-boy IN MY MOUTH, BISH!"
NNNOOOOO!!!
Okay, for real now. Igor just kind of looked at him blankly like, I dunno, run, bish?
And his comrade continued, "You sing."
And I thought, Yeah, bish. You sing. Loudly. And as beautiful as you can.
It's what sets you apart from the monsters.
So, if you'll allow me... A little flashback.
***Disclaimer: Igor Stravinsky was not a homosexual. Monsieur Kevin Charnas merely chose the term for comedic effect.
***Disclaimer #2: Monsieur Kevin Charnas doesn't usually go by "Monsieur".
He prefers Mademoiselle. Or Madame Oh La La on special occasions. Merci beaucoup.
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"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."
