Oatmeal Is Not Foreplay (Okay, Sometimes it is...)

in

Poor Wen has been itching and scratching for 2 weeks, so at the suggestion of my Vet, I'm getting ready to get naked in the bathtub with this little hottie and a pot of warm oatmeal... to pour over her... and to work into her fur... and let dry... You're jealous. Don't lie... (and just look at her... little does she know... she's gonna be all, "WTF, BISH?! YOU JUST SMEARED OATMEAL IN BOTH OUR PRIVS!! Oh... Wait a minute... Is this foreplay or something?") NO, WENNIE!! IT'S NOT!! She's naughty... :( Wen in wicker

AND the email I sent the Vet post-oatmealageddon, "Oh... my... GOD...

There is oatmeal EVERY WHERE.

OMG. OMG.

It's on the bathroom sink, the toilet, the baseboards, 4 feet up in the air on the shower curtain, on the walls, the rugs in the house, my bedspread, my pillows, her bed, her pillows... blankets in the living room... I think I used too much water... Is it suppose to be so pasty? Omg.

AND she's still itching the living daylights out of herself... And now eating oatmeal. Is that going to give her the shits?

And I have oatmeal smeared in my privs.

Thanks a lot. I'm going to choke you."

He replied, "You're just suppose to do a little bit. It's suppose to be a tea, not porridge. Why do you have it smeared on your peeper...?"

Okay. So, I didn't tell him about my privs and he didn't inquire about my peeper...

Yet.

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Some Sunday Morning Worship

in

i love it when you fall... (no. i mean it. i really love it.)

in

Who knew that slipping and rolling down the hill was total foreplay...

Apparently, the dog did.

He showed her just who's boss. "YEAH!!! TAKE THAT!!! IF YOU'RE GONNA BE ALL HOT AND SEXY SLIDDIN' DOWN THE HILL? WELL... UUHH-UUHH-UUHH-UUHH!!! YEAH, BABY!! YEAH!!"

And the person with the camera just zooms right in. Perv.

(Muchas gracias for this video contribution, Enrique! Perv.)

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Some Sunday Worship

in

I don't think I can adequately describe to you how much I FRICKING LOVE THESE. I. Love. Them.

*** Little Friends Lifestyle Pet Photography by Seth Casteel

(THANK YOU so much for telling me about these, M. Earnest! And don't you dare forget, you be the shizzle, Meerie. Don't let NO ONE tell you otherwise. Dang.)

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In A Galaxy Far, Far Away...

in

I fricking LOVE dogs.

But, I think you already knew that.

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***Disclaimer: This is in NO WAY a Herculaneum endorsement for Volkswagen. Herculaneum would rather endorse something more serene and invigorating... Like Schwinn or Trek... Or... Humans' legs. To walk on two feet is pretty amazing. Miraculous, really. (I think we just forget it sometimes.)

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"Chubbs" on a Monday

in

It's Not Just ANY Monday...

in

I can't believe she put us in these god damn fast food costumes... Who's the BITCH now?? Keep your eyes on her, guys... It looks like she's lickin' her chops.

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*** Shit, It's Monday #12 *** BBAAHH!! It’s Monday… *** Shit, It's Monday (As Far As The Eye Can See...) *** Everyone Just Calm The F Down… It’s Only “Monday" *** Shit, It's Monday #8 *** Shit, It's Monday #7 *** Shit, It's Monday #6 *** Shit, It's Monday #5 *** Shit, It's Monday #4 *** Shit, It's Monday #3 *** Shit, It's Monday #2 *** Shit, It's Monday

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