A Long Communist's Nap

Pole wakes from 19-year coma in democratic country

WARSAW (Reuters) - "A 65-year-old railwayman who fell into a coma following an accident in communist Poland regained consciousness 19 years later to find democracy and a market economy, Polish media reported on Saturday.

Wheelchair-bound Jan Grzebski, whom doctors had given only two or three years to live following his 1988 accident, credited his caring wife Gertruda with his revival.

"It was Gertruda that saved me, and I'll never forget it," Grzebski told news channel TVN24."

Dude...I have a distinct feeling that if you DO forget that she saved you? You're going to be dead, because she's going to kill you.

So, basically Gertruda kicked ass and turned his ass once an hour for 19 fucking years. Holy, holy, holy crap what a woman. I would've sold Jan's comatose ass to science after 19 days. And then used the money to buy vodka. But, that's just me.

Seriously though. 19 YEARS!!!

"Grzebski awoke to find his four children had all married and produced 11 grandchildren during his years in hospital.

He said he vaguely recalled the family gatherings he was taken to while in a coma and his wife and children trying to communicate with him."

I can only imagine what they did with him at these "family gatherings". I wonder if they tried to polka with him?

Now maybe had Gertruda waxed her upper lip, shaved the mole, and sported one of the outfits like one of the nurses below, and maybe had she tended to him with her lesbian lover (like the trio in the below video) he would've woken up sooner.

***Atomik Harmonik - Turbo Polka***

I have a confession to make. I LOVE the accordion in polka music. And I fucking love to polka and do it like nobody's business. I LOVE IT. And I don't care who knows about it.

***Lynn Marie & The Boxhounds - Squeeze Box Polka***

Seriously, 19 YEARS IN A COMA...

And I complain about traffic and the fog.