Holy Swizzle-Bishes, Batman!

Looks like we ordered a double-double entendre for the title, yes?

Hold the "pickles".

OH! OH! A triple decker!

Just make sure those "buns" are toasted.

OH! OH! A fourboople one! Or I guess that would be a "quadruple" one.

These girlfriends be CCRRAAZZYY, bishes! They're all swinging around and flipping and grasping and standing and stretching and all kinds of kookie-krazy nonsense! (Speaking of which, I don't know if you noticed, but I just spelled crazy with a "k". See? I can be bold and dangerous too! They think they're so tough... YOU AIN'T SO TOUGH, YOU INDIAN GYMNASTS YOU! They ain't so tough...)

Okay, so they're total badasses. And in little speedos too. I just about blew out both of my newly reconstructed hernias just watching these crazy pole-dancin' bishes. Dang.

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(Thank you for this, Louise! You have REAL WORTH, Louise... And don't you dare let anyone ever tell you otherwise. Not ever.)

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My Dad's "Magical Moment"

LCDR Steve C. Charnas on the front page of the news paper, bishes...

Three Generations Flying High September 20, 2010 - By VIRGINIA SHANK Tribune Chronicle (source)

This is part of a weekly series published each Monday between Memorial Day and Veterans Day honoring local veterans.

WARREN, OH. He's maneuvered more than a dozen types of aircraft through three wars. But it was that moment when he, his son and grandson stood together on the platform at the Pensacola Naval Air Station this summer that outshone every other milestone Steve Charnas experienced as a U.S. Navy pilot.

He passed his own gold wings on to his 27-year-old grandson, Nicholas Charnas.

''It was a magical moment,'' the 83-year-old veteran recalled. ''I had a lot of high points in the Navy. I could say that when I made my first landing. I could say a lot of things. But in the end, after all of that, I would have to say that was the moment. That was it, the greatest experience. That was truly the most magical moment in my life.''

Nicholas Charnas was the most recent member of the family to receive his wings during a ceremony at Pensacola in May. His grandfather, who got his wings in 1955, said it was an honor to stand on the same platform with the other pilots in his family. His son Chris, Nicholas' father, had also served as a Navy pilot before becoming a commercial pilot, earning his wings more than 20 years ago.

The three men stood proud of each other as other service personnel, friends and family members offered them a standing ovation.

''I guess it's a rare thing,'' Steve Charnas said. ''It's one thing to have a father and son, or even to have three generations serve in the military. But I guess it's rare to have three generations earn their wings and all of them still be alive to talk about it and to be standing on the same platform together. That's rare. That's special. It was very special for me.''

The elder Charnas' Navy career was initiated when he was a senior at Warren G. Harding High School. That was in 1944, during World War II. He didn't want to be drafted into the Army, so he enlisted in the Navy - his first choice of military service.

''I didn't even graduate with my class,'' he said. ''My sister got my diploma for me. I just didn't want to risk it. I had wanted to be in the Navy and I wanted to make sure that's where I went.''

He spent the next 25 years traveling around the world, often taking his wife and children with him. His passion for the Navy and his service as a pilot inspired his son, Chris, to follow in his path.

''I had gone to Kent State like my father, but I really didn't know what I wanted to do,'' Chris Charnas, 55, said. ''My dad had always been so excited about the Navy. So that's what I did. You could say his enthusiasm rubbed off on me.

''Now we have three generations of pilots and I know he's really proud of that. We're just as proud of him as he is of us. I'm proud of my son and I'm glad my dad was there to share in that. It was a great moment.''

Steve Charnas served as part of the occupying force in Japan in the late 1940s. The initial call was to invade Japan if they didn't surrender.

''But she did,'' he said. ''I spent 10 months there and they started sending people home. I was going to stay. I liked it there. But a friend of mine talked me out of it, so I came home.''

He came home to Warren and attended Kent State University on the GI Bill, earning a bachelor's degree in commerce. By then he had his first stripe. He joined up with the Navy Reserves.

When the Korean War started he wanted to try out his stripe and requested active duty. He met his wife, Maureen, on Catalina Island. They married in 1954.

Then one day, at the age of 26 while in San Diego, he was watching the planes break formation.

''I was just sitting there, watching on deck, and I said 'I gotta try that,'' he said. ''But the cutoff age to start training was 26-1/2. So I didn't have much time. I just made it. It was one of the best things I've ever done.''

Although he was active military during Vietnam, he didn't have to go there. And although he saw three wars during his career, he said he never fired a shot at anyone in anger.

He served as a pilot and a flight instructor before retiring in 1969. Afterward, he continued flying, working as a commercial pilot for several private companies and corporations and continued flying for pleasure until recently.

''It's something that gets in your blood,'' he said. ''Not all of it was easy. But I would rather focus on the better parts of it than the bad. I have no regrets about my time in the service. I wouldn't trade it. It gave me a lot of opportunities and I am very grateful for that.''

He said he was stunned when the crowd of about 100 people stood up for him, his son and grandson at Pensacola.

''A standing ovation?'' he said softly, shaking his head slowly. ''That still amazes me. I was proud. I'm not ashamed to say that. I was really proud. Stunned, but proud. Now that was something special. That was my magical moment.''

(From L to R) Christopher Charnas, Nicholas Charnas and LCDR Steve C. Charnas *************

(From L to R) Christopher Charnas, Nicholas Charnas and LCDR Steve C. Charnas **************

(From L to R) Nicholas Charnas, Steve C. Charnas and Christopher Charnas ***************

(From L to R) Nicholas Charnas, Steve C. Charnas and Christopher Charnas ***************

(From L to R) LCDR Steve C. Charnas, Nicholas Charnas and Maureen Charnas ***************

I wasn't able to be at that ceremony. And I'll forever regret that... I heard there wasn't a dry eye in the house. That doesn't surprise me... I tear up just thinking about it. But, I'm one proud son and brother and uncle. And thank you, boys, for your service.

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(From L to R) Maureen, Chris, Nick, Steve and Jeanne Charnas (Nick's mom and my wonderful sister-in-law). I had to throw this in there because not ONE OF THEM is looking at the camera. (Please feel free to click the image to enlarge so you can see them looking off in all kinds of directions.)

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