HERCULANEUM

I am... DYING. And if I were to be completely honest with you (as though I'm ever not...), my bitter ass was slightly disappointed at the lack of carnage. I was quietly hoping for lightning to strike him, but no...

This guy is hysterical. Literally. And now that I think of it, I'll have what he's having. (Mushrooms?)

But again, to be completely honest, I hope that I can be more like this guy. Not the sobbing part... But the... His... enthusiasm... His appreciation. TRUE appreciation... His... Oohh, F it. The sobbing too. Bring it on. I'd like to be more like him... It's better than where I'm currently at.

So, we have our dashing correspondent in D.C. to thank for this contribution... Thank you, Dickie!!

xoxoxo

oh my god... oh my god... OH MY GOD... I JUST DID A TRIPLE "XOXOXO". A TRIPLE ONE!!! OH MY GOD... right there. not 30 words ago I wrote a TRIPLE "xoxoxo"

oh my god... I DID IT AGAIN!!!!

*sob, sob, sob*

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