HERCULANEUM

One of my bestest friends ever wrote me this morning. We've been close friends since Third grade. She's such a good friend that a few years back, when a dentist wanted to sand-down a few chips in my front teeth, I said,

"Don't you dare. LeLannie put those there in the Fifth grade when she stole my mittens and I was chasing her on the playground. She slipped and fell on the ice, then I slipped and fell on top of her, slamming my chin onto her head and chipping all of my front teeth. You're not touching those chips."

The dentist just stared at me like I was completely insane, but I didn't give a fuck. Those chipped teeth tell a story, so I'm keeping them. So what if I can't eat solid food.

Anyway, LeLannie wrote to me this morning. She sent me some dialogue between her and her BOSS, "Stank Bish". Her boss, "Stank Bish", forwarded her some inane, bullshit email, but LeLannie had something to say about it.

The forward was titled: "Please join me in prayer" and was as follows:

"We were in Pigeon Forge over the week end. On Sunday, we left to come home. Traffic was moving slowly, and a car in front of us had an Obama bumper sticker on it. It read: "Pray for Obama. Psalm 109:8".
Mike's Bible was lying on the dash board." (Because having your bible on your dashboard makes you so much closer to god. And let me guess, that American flag on your bumper makes you a better American.) "He got it, opened it up to the scripture, and read it." (And you read in traffic, nice.) "He started laughing and laughing. Then he read it to me. I couldn't believe what it said. I had a good laugh, too."

Psalm 109:8
"Let his days be few; and let another take his office."

So, LeLannie replied:

"This is sad to me, and they call themselves Christians. Maybe they need to do a little more studying of their bible and what Jesus really stands for."

And Stank Bish replied:

"I think they simply mean they want him out of office- that his days in office be few not his life:)"

And LeLannie replied again:

"Stank Bish,

Read verse 9-10, to me a childless father and widow means death:

Let his days be few; and let another take his office.
9Let his children be fatherless, and his wife a widow.
10Let his children be continually vagabonds, and beg: let them seek their bread also out of their desolate places.

The context of this prayer is about praying for someone's death and misery, this kind of language feeds extemist beliefs and violence.

LeLannie"

I'm so fricking proud of "LeLannie". She had the courage to stand up to not just anyone, but she stood up to her BOSS.

And that makes her a TOTAL BADASS.

Muy bien, LeLannie... Muy bien to that spirit of yours.

Look at me gettin' all spanglish and mierda.

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