"Your skin is so...smooth..."

"Oh yeah...you like that? Huh? Do you? Your skin...it's so smooth...it's like...it's like a hard plastic. Right on, baby. And your ass? It's so firm and...rather unmovable. I mean, yeah, it's great that I can put your arms and legs in all kinds of different positions, even though they won't bend. But you seem kind of distant. Sssshhhh...It's okay, you don't need to say anything. Your tits though...Wow...they're like...plastic watermelons. THEY'RE AWESOME! Were you born with those? And your puss is so...bare. You like the Brazilian, huh? I'm cool with that. I'm sorry about all that glass shattering everywhere. I needed to get you out of there! I hope I didn't cut you. It's kind of crazy, you aren't even bleeding! I'm glad that you didn't forget your purse."

Man with mannequin fetish arrested again
A Detroit man with a history of smashing store windows to grab female mannequins has been accused of indulging his fetish again.

Our correspondent; Dickie in D.C. has been hard at work again finding us these outrageous stories, thankfully. Another fantastic contribution, Dickie gives great link, doesn't he? THANKS DICKIE! I think that Ronald may have an aversion to commitment and probably isn't very good at communication. I may be wrong though.